Where would I be without you?

F*cked?

Screwed?

Up the proverbial creek and severely lacking that much desired paddle?

Abso-freakin-lutely.

Yup, I'll confess, even as one of the more tenacious (a.k.a. control freak) and independent women of the world, the pregnancy and parenting life threw me many curly ones when I signed up... all of which (though it appals me to admit) I could never have survived alone.

Trying to work and function whilst feeling like I was permanently in freefall with a killer hangover - the first 12 weeks of pregnancy were torture. And as my bump grew bigger, my ability to survive alone gradually disintegrated, to the point where I couldn't even reach my feet to put my shoes on myself.

Labour lasted a tumultuous 3 days, in which the birth plan was about as relevant as my Year 10 algebra homework. And though my heady days of back to back partying trained me well for functioning on zero sleep, the early months of newborn insanity took sleep deprivation to a whole new level.

But what made it all, not only tolerable, but also created some of the best moments of my life?

Simple...

You.

My Partner.

The Dad.

You were there to help me when my feet became about as inaccessible to me as the Bolivian plains. To always get things from the bottom drawers, and to laugh with me about the ridiculousness of my situation when unable to heave myself off of the couch.

When labour struck, not only were you there through every arduous moment, you were that much needed face of love and dependability, who in the frenzy of it all going to shit was there to tell me it would all be OK.

And through those early months of endless sleep deprivation and feeding, you were there every step of the way - from the midnight explosive nappy situations, to your magic 4am baby settling touch.

You bring reason and sense to the chaos, and you make it clear that we are doing this together - no matter how exhausting and out of control baby-life can get. 

I'd secretly doubted you could really pull off the support role for pregnancy and labour, because what I truly needed was so intangible. I didn’t need the bins taking out, or the steps fixing. There was no job description or To Do list, and to be honest, neither of us had a clue what was coming our way.

But what you managed, without question or prompting, to clue yourself into what was happening and be my wing man, my cheer squad, and my carer all in one... which I know for anyone - male or female - is a challenge.

And you did it all so easily, simply because I could see that this time you really wanted it.

And the biggest privilege of all for me?

To witness you grow into the most incredible father I know.

So, for anyone out there concerned about becoming a dad, or fretting over being up to the challenge of the labour room, to succeed you just need to give in and embrace the idea of being a dad... the rest will simply follow.

So get involved, show her you give a shit, because it will make the world of difference to her, and you never know - you might just enjoy it...

Remote Controlled

One of my biggest failings as a parent is TV.

Yes, I ashamedly hold my hand up to the confession that screentime is the babysitter in our house.

The love affair started very innocently as a single rendezvous with Iggle Piggle and his lovely bright garden, but it swiftly led to my days being increasingly controlled by DJ Lance Rock, the Wiggles, or a myriad of other brightly dancing characters.

And every time I reach for the remote - those times I need to do some work, laundry, or make dinner – I’m always painfully conscious of that niggling maternal guilt of not tending to my 3 year old as best I could.

However, on the flipside, there have been many times where I’ve been so grateful for the few minutes grace, that if I ever met an Octonaut in real life I’d kiss him and buy him a pint.

So is there a happy medium? And more importantly, how much is too much?

The Facts

Well, the current Australian guidelines for screentime for preschoolers are that children under 2 years old do not spend any time viewing TV or any electronic media, and children 2-5 years watch less than 1 hour per day.

An Australian study of preschoolers (aged 1-4) found that a child’s risk of being overweight increased by 6% for every hour of TV watched per day, and if that child had a TV in their bedroom, the odds of being overweight leapt an additional 31% for every hour watched.

In a comparison of children who had more than 2 hours screen time a day to those who had less, those with over 2 hours are at increased risk of being:

·   Overweight

·   Less physically active

·   Drink more sugary drinks

·   Snack on foods high in sugar, salt and fat

·   Have fewer social interactions.

Excessive TV has also been linked to other negative outcomes such as poor cognitive performance, antisocial behaviour and reduced sleep time. And research now indicates that for every hour of television children watch each day, their risk of developing attention-related problems later increases by 10%. To put it into context, if a child watches child watches 3 hours of TV a day, that child would be 30% more likely to develop attention deficit disorder.

Scary stuff.

What can you do to cut it down?

·   Limit channel surfing or background TV. When a chosen show is over, turn it off.

·   Limit TV on weekdays and keep it as a something special for the weekend

·   Identify non-screen activities that your child likes around the house

·   Eat at the table as a family, not in front of the TV

·   Have TV time happen around the same time every day, so your child knows that TV isn’t an ever-present possibility.

·   Always watch your child so you can talk about what you are watching. Children at this age don’t know fact from fiction.

·   Model TV viewing for your child. If you are sitting in front of the TV for hours, they will want to know why they can’t too.

But does what they watch make a difference?

Personally, in our house it is only ever educational or age appropriate shows. Yo Gabba Gabba being a firm favourite, closely followed by Octonauts and Sesame Street. So I feel a little vindicated that at least we are learning and growing as we stare at the box. But we will certainly be installing some stricter viewing rules to ensure we fall under that 1 hour a day... right after this episode of Dora finishes...

Do you have any particular rules when it comes to TV?

How do you find the ‘Off’ button?